Social media isn't special

Me, looking around at the Internet right now: “I’ve got to start playing more games.”

I think the internet is great. I think social media can be great. My friends and family are geographically dispersed and I am so grateful to be able to stay on top of not only big life changes but little delights that used only to be accessible to friends who stayed nearby.

I bristle at the claim that everyone’s life would be better if we all unplugged completely. Condemning outright something that can facilitate low-cost human connection is a bad idea. And besides, you don’t have to use social media. Or have a smartphone, or a TV, or any other piece of modern tech. It’s fine. If it works for you, don’t use it. This is a completely morally neutral decision.

The more we treat social media like absolutely everything else, the more useful our response to it will be.

The predominant reaction to the should-not-be-surprising revelation that anything people do as often as they use social media leads to a dopamine reward sometimes feels like panic (or at least an affectation of panic) because dopamine supposedly implies “addictive”. But everything fun triggers a dopamine response (that whole thread is great).

Social media is(?) just something fun. We should enjoy fun and be mindful of how we get it.

Going cold turkey on social media seems silly (but again, if it’s for you, that’s fine. totally morally neutral). But thinking about why you’re using it, whether it’s fulfilling those needs, and how it’s affecting you seems as sensible with social media as it is with everything else.

For what do I use social media?

1. Keep in touch with friends and family

2. Promote my work

3. Follow the news

4. Follow commentary I enjoy

5. Pass the time in a fun way

   1. esp: Follow the Detroit Lions

   2. but also: Work through things I’m thinking about

These things don’t have to go together, however common it is for them to be bundled right now. These things are not equally rewarding or stressful. They can all be done in more than one way, and not every way of filling all of these needs is equally stressful or rewarding. You can schedule lunch, coffee, or a phone call with a friend. You can start a newsletter (hello!) to promote your work. You can read news sites (plug for the most local sources plus the most boring national/international news source you can find). You can read commentary (do not confuse this with news) where it’s published.

And there are lots of ways to have fun that don’t come with all the baggage that sometimes sneaks onto social media with its other functions.

It’s useful to be aware of how you react to the things you do—whether they drain your resources or help fill you up—and why you do those things. And it’s useful to think about whether or not you can meet those needs in a way that, if it can’t fill you up, at least does not drain you so much.

So, like I said. I’ve got to start playing more games.

Featured photo is by Robin Worrall on UnSplash